Work keeps pulling rank on my eggnog latte. I'm about to pull rank on Work.
It's time for change.
Speaking of change. I've officially closed my since-seventh-grade-email-account. It's not really a big deal, but I felt myself breathe a little tiny internal sigh of relief when i clicked 'deactivate' this afternoon. That chapter is officially closed.
I'm thankful that the seeds of change started to grow a few months ago when we decided to put roots into our little piece of Florida. I think that decision has changed a lot for us, even if temporarily it's just invisible change inside myself, inside ouuuurselves.
I have taken baby steps to purge our apartment. It's no where near finished, but I have lists of things to organize, actual piles to organize, garbage bags of stuff to get rid of, even a handful of boxes in various stages of packing.
I hope this act isn't "counting our chickens before they're hatched." We still have yet to hear back from the bank.
They've officially surpassed their November-5th-decision-date, meaning we will have to request an extension. Which... when Jeff told us this back in September, I assumed then that we would have to request an extension. I assumed it wouldn't be all: 'wham bam thank you mam, here's your keys." But now that it's November 27th, and we still have yet to hear word... it feels a little more discouraging then I wanted it to.
It's a process i know, i know, i know, i know.
Still. For myself, I must move forward & hope for the best. So i continue to browse ikea's website & dream of cozy new spaces...
Up in the air or not... life is oh-so-good. We had the best Thanksgiving ever. Well maybe not ever. But it was pretty dang good. I've never been so happy & settled... it's been a good six-years since I feel that i've had any sort of roots.. and roots are wooonnderful let me tell you.
We were graciously invited to a couple different places, but we opted to stay in, which is so us. We are such homebodies, we really are. Not to mention, days off together are such a rarity, that we tend to be pretty selfish with them. We also made a pact to have a non-tradish turkey-less day. We went a little southern actually. Chicken fried steak/made-from-scratch stuffin'/mashed sweet pah-tay-tahs & spiced hot apple cider (on the stove!) .... among maaaany other deeelish items. We had all the elements of a good t-day... each other, all-day cooking sesh, house full of smelly goodness, movies & x-mas tunes!!!
The feeling of acceptance of our *new* life, the saying goodbye to, 'maybe next year we'll go *home* ... it makes for all kinds of warm fuzzies that start from my toes & run laps all over my body.
It's not perfect, or free of worry, and often it's still very confusing... but it's allllllll goooooood, and right now I can't ask for more.
Sounds so nice to be able to get rid of that cloud over your head of Should we leave or should we stay. Nice to just say, for now we are staying and not having to worry about the what if. Your thanksgiving sounds really awesome and cozy. :) Glad you're feeling the effects of having 'roots'..nice to have a part of your life that feels settled even when its a feeling that comes and goes. Isn't it great when change feels refreshing rather than binding? <3 you bunches.
ReplyDeleteHappy to hear that your "In-Between" feels somewhat settled. And taking "forward steps" just because that is what feels right at the moment...maybe it won't in the future...but for now...it's what feels right! And NOT dwelling on the "what if it doesn't happen" and well, IF it doesn't, not condemning yourselves, but still moving forward in a different direction if the direction you're going now doesn't pan out. Just staying positive and happy and taking baby steps is the best thing you can do.
ReplyDeleteSounds like a perfect time for the two of you. Our plans (Rick & me) were changed on Weds morning when I was at work and all-the-sudden, I had the flu! I started shaking uncontrollably, became nauseated and as soon as I puked I went to my boss and said I had to go home. (This all happened in less than 10 minutes!) One of my co-workers said she'd never seen anyone so white - she said, "Even your lips are white!" Anyway, I was shaking so bad I had Rick pick me up (we also had snow and more was coming). He took me to his house and I crawled into bed in the guest room. A heavy robe, sox, fur scarf, sheets, 2 blankets and 2 Down comforters, a space heater and the furnace turned up, it took me over 2 hours to stop shaking. But I puked most of the day. Anyway, didn't mean to hijack your post, but it was a really long way of saying that Rick & I had a very quiet Thanksgiving. Yours sounded much more pleasant! Love you!
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